30 Funny Quotes of The Day

Here is 30 Funny Quotes of The Day;

1- You cry, I cry, …you laugh, I laugh…you jump off a cliff I laugh even harder!!

You cry, I cry, …you laugh, I laugh…you jump off a cliff I laugh even harder!!


2- Never steal. The government hates competition.

Never steal. The government hates competition.


3- 1f you c4n r34d 7h15, you r34lly n33d 2 g37 l41d

1f you c4n r34d 7h15, you r34lly n33d 2 g37 l41d


4- Some people are like Slinky’s. Pretty much useless but make you smile when you push them down the stairs.

Some people are like Slinky’s. Pretty much useless but make you smile when you push them down the stairs.


5- Never argue with an idiot they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you through experience

Never argue with an idiot they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you through experience


6- Smile…It confuses people..!!

Smile…It confuses people..!!


7- Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?

Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?


8- Everybody wishes they could go to heaven but no one wants to die.

Everybody wishes they could go to heaven but no one wants to die.


9- Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.


10- Why are they called apartments if they are all stuck together?

Why are they called apartments if they are all stuck together?


11- An apple a day keeps the doctor away, But if the doctor is cute forget the fruit.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, But if the doctor is cute forget the fruit.


12- I wish my book of life was written in pencil … There are a few pages I would like to erase.

I wish my book of life was written in pencil … There are a few pages I would like to erase.


13- Save paper, don’t do home work.

Save paper, don’t do home work.


14- All guys hate the words DON’T and STOP unless they’re put together.

All guys hate the words DON’T and STOP unless they’re put together.


15- Do not drink and drive or you might spill the drink.

Do not drink and drive or you might spill the drink.


16- I’m an excellent housekeeper..Every time I get divorce I keep the house ;- )

I’m an excellent housekeeper..Every time I get divorce I keep the house ;- )


17- Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.


18- When nothing goes right, Go left.

When nothing goes right, Go left.


19- Save water and shower together

Save water and shower together


20- It is easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission.

It is easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission.


21- Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.

Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.


22- If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.

If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.


23- I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.

I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.


24- Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped

Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped


25- When life gives you lemons…throw them over your shoulder and look for an orange

When life gives you lemons…throw them over your shoulder and look for an orange


26- Adults are just kids with money.

Adults are just kids with money.


27- Why do they put pizza in a square box?

Why do they put pizza in a square box?


28- Coffee, Chocolate, Men. The richer the better!

Coffee, Chocolate, Men. The richer the better!


29- Everyone has the right to their own opinion… Yours is just wrong.

Everyone has the right to their own opinion… Yours is just wrong.


30- Flying is learning how to fall without hitting the ground.

Flying is learning how to fall without hitting the ground.